Mindful Moves: Trauma-Informed Insights

There comes a moment when even the most dedicated among us feel the pull of stillness. The body whispers before the mind catches up: shoulders heavy, jaw tight, thoughts circling like restless birds. That whisper is often ignored in the rush of work, deadlines, and endless responsibility, until it becomes a shout. That’s when we need to step away. Not in defeat, but in care. For me, that reset happens by the sea. The moment my feet touch the sand, my nervous system seems to recognise something older than memory. The salty air, the sound of waves, the wide horizon, they all work together to remind my body that it’s safe to soften. The sea doesn’t ask me to achieve or perform; it simply invites me to be. When I spend time there with my family, something shifts even more deeply. Watching my loved ones laugh, skim stones, or walk quietly alongside me grounds me in a way no meeting or achievement ever could. Their presence, coupled with the rhythmic rise and fall of the tide, dr...

  When Menopause Masquerades as Poor Performance: A Call to Reframe Capability It usually begins with something subtle. She starts arriving a few minutes later than usual. Her notes might be more scattered, her words slower to find. A team member mentions that she’s “snappy” in handovers. She sighs in meetings. She rubs her temples. One day, she forgets an important detail that would normally be second nature. Then the whispers begin. “She’s struggling.” “Something’s off.” “Is she okay?” “Maybe this job is too much now.” But what if the question isn’t about performance at all? What if it’s about perimenopause or menopause , and we’ve never been taught to recognise it? The Invisible Pause Despite all the awareness campaigns and headlines, menopause remains largely invisible in the workplace. And yet, it’s not a rare experience. It’s universal for those who menstruate and reach midlife. It’s not “just a phase” or a list of symptoms on a pamphlet. It’s a full-body, full-being tr...

  When Stress Speaks Louder Than Words: Why We Struggle to Listen Under Pressure We’ve all had moments where someone’s speaking to us, maybe delivering important information, difficult feedback, or bad news, and yet we can’t seem to hear a single word properly. It’s not that we’re being dismissive or don’t care. It’s that our system has already gone into survival mode, and in that state, true listening isn’t just hard; it’s almost biologically impossible. Understanding why this happens is vital, not just for our own awareness but for how we lead, care, and connect with others, especially in high-stakes environments like health and social care. When we start to see this through a trauma-informed lens, the pieces begin to make a lot more sense. The Physiology of Not Listening Let’s start with the body. When we’re under stress, our nervous system responds automatically. The vagus nerve, the key player in our parasympathetic “rest and digest” system, goes offline, and our sympa...

When We Keep Going: The Strange, Brave Dance of Progress Have you ever noticed how life rarely moves in a neat, straight line? We’re taught that success is all about relentless forward motion, hustle harder, push through, and never give up. And yet, anyone who’s ever done anything hard knows that progress doesn’t always look like a single upward climb. Sometimes it feels like we’re wading through mud. Other times it’s two steps back, one step forward—or worse, we stand still for what feels like forever, holding our breath in the middle of the unknown. So what is it that makes us keep showing up, even when every part of us wants to quit? The Fuel Beneath the Frustration If you ask people what keeps them going, the answers are as messy and varied as we are. For some, it’s love—for a child, a partner, or a dream version of themselves they’re not ready to give up on. For others, it’s sheer stubbornness, the refusal to let life win without a fight. Sometimes it’s hope in disguis...

    When Love Hurts the Nervous System: Narcissistic Abuse Through a Trauma-Informed Lens For World Narcissistic Abuse Awareness Day – June 1st We often hear that love is patient, kind, and safe. But for many, love has also been confusing, consuming, and deeply unsafe. On World Narcissistic Abuse Awareness Day , we pause to honour those whose lives have been silently shaped by the invisible bruises of emotional manipulation and chronic control. This kind of abuse doesn't always leave visible scars. But it leaves deep, neurological imprints , especially on the nervous system. What Is Narcissistic Abuse? Narcissistic abuse isn’t simply about being with someone who’s self-absorbed or vain. It's a form of emotional and psychological abuse inflicted by someone exhibiting narcissistic personality traits or full-blown Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). At its core, narcissistic abuse is about control, exploitation, and eroding your sense of self , often so subtly that you begi...

Why People with Complex PTSD Often Sleep a Lot (And Why That’s Not Laziness) You might have heard it or said it yourself. "I’m just tired all the time." "Even after 10 hours, I still wake up exhausted." "Sometimes I feel like all I do is sleep—and I still can't catch up." For many people living with Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (CPTSD), this is more than occasional burnout. It’s a pattern. A fog. A cycle that doesn’t seem to make sense from the outside, but makes perfect sense once you understand what CPTSD does to the body and brain. So, why do people with CPTSD sleep a lot? And why is it not laziness, weakness, or avoidance? Let’s break it down. 1. The Body Is Always Bracing for Impact When you live through repeated trauma, especially in childhood or over a prolonged period, your nervous system adapts to survive. Hypervigilance, muscle tension, and an always-on stress response become your “normal”. Even at rest, your body...

  Unspoken Agreements: The Power of Psychological Contracts in Organisational Change When organisations shift, be it through restructuring, role changes, or cultural transformation, the focus is often on the visible: job titles, processes, and policies. But beneath all that, something more subtle but just as critical is taking shape (or falling apart): the psychological contract . It’s not written down. You won’t find it in your induction pack. But it’s there, shaping how we show up, how safe we feel, and how we relate to those we work with. As someone who has led and worked alongside frontline staff, carers, nurses, and managers for over three decades, I’ve learnt this: when psychological contracts are not acknowledged and nurtured, working relationships can quietly unravel—and during change, the damage compounds. Let’s explore this through a trauma-informed lens. What is a Psychological Contract? Simply put, a psychological contract is the unspoken agreement between p...